Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Randomize
