My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
