You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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