she looked like the bat from fern gully.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
