I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
whose ass print is on the piano?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
