If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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