the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
