As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
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