Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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