Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
