Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I think my vagina is haunted
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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