just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
