Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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