Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
