I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Randomize
