Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I just saw a hot homeless man
Swine flu. Run for my life!
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
