Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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