Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
