Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
love makes seman taste better
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
