Me. At least after what I've been through.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
