so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize
