can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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