I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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