I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
