I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
