Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
