i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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