are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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