for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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