We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
