And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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