I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
