there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
