she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Randomize
