FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
