I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
