It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
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