He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
