she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
sex in a hospital.. check
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
