they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
As shirtless as possible
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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