Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
