And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Randomize
