If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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