Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
