Plan B is the new Plan A
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
false alarm, still single
Randomize
