My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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