It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
