Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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