My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
