Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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